i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
