chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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