Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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