We tried having a conversation with our noses.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
