cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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