I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
