So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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