Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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