you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Randomize
