Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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