Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
