Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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