Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize