How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize