Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize