singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
