The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
