I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
