is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I understand Curling. That high.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize