so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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