I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
It's Friday. Sex?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
