Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
