that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
