Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
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