i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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