Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
is wine microwaveable?
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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