God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
they're like a gay fantastic four
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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