i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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