She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
