i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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