Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
soo... how was my night?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize