My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
