none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
