she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
