Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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