I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
We named our party play list daddy issues
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize