return my video game
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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