sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
