i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Randomize
