this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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