It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
