It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
