someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
