that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
My ass is underappreciated
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
