dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
