I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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