Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
