yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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