Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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