3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
So. Much. Porn.
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