Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
